BREASTFEEDING A TODDLER

1st - 7th August is World Breastfeeding Week, celebrated in more than 170 countries every year.

I am a proud breast feeding mumma! When I was pregnant I hoped I would be able to breast feed but wasn't going to put pressure on myself if I couldn't.  As Harriet turns 2 this month and we are still  nursing, I think it is important to write this post. 

Most people who find out I'm still nursing my toddler are sadly shocked and some even horrified.  She has teeth!  You're doing it for you not her.  You need to tell her no.  Sadly this is what I hear day in day out.

Even though I was happy and ready to stop nursing when she turned one, Harriet had other ideas.  Not interested in dummies or comforters, I was always and still am her comfort.  When she is hurt, scared, tired, upset, poorly, breast feeding works wonders.  Through sleepless nights of teething and more recently with colds and viral infections, when she's too poorly to eat, thank god I've got boobs. Yes sometimes, when it's bed time and she will only fall asleep whilst nursing, I think have I made a rod for my own back?  But she is two not twenty two, her needs will change.  She will grow out of it like she's grown out of baby toys, like children grow out of using nappies.  I think a lot of people forget she is still very young, still solely dependent on me.  Yes her speech is excellent for her age and she can have quite the conversation with you, but she still gets scared, frustrated, tired.  Toddlers feed for many of the same reasons as infants: nutrition, security, comfort and reassurance.  Even the World Health Organization and UNICEF recommend that babies be breastfed for at least two years.

Some say that a breastfeeding toddler will have difficulty becoming independent.  My child is the most independent little girl you've ever met.  She is confident around her peers and adults, she makes friends easily and is quite happy to be left at nursery or with grandparents.  She sleeps all night and eats a balanced diet.  Does she sometimes mess about and want 'boobie' because I've said no to something, or told her off or because she's trying to avoid bedtime?  Yes.  But this is all part of learning.  She is starting to understand boundaries and how to push them.  Her personality is blossoming and with that comes testing times.  It doesn't mean I stop nursing her, this is when she needs reassurance and familiarity

I am also asked constantly when am I going to stop.  Although I am ready and have been for quite a while, she still feels she needs it and whilst she wants to nurse it is fine by me.  Some mums chose not to or couldn't breast feed, some only nursed for a few weeks and some for a few months, and you know what?  That's ok too.  You have to do what is right for you, your needs and your babies. 

But for those that are doing extended nursing... in this modern world where children grow up too quickly, I say to you all; relish this time.  Who cares what anyone else says?  It's your body, your baby and there's no right or wrong.

Just keep on boobing

Victoria
xx

THE GREAT OUTDOORS

It's May, the sun is shining (most days) so we've been able to spend more time outdoors.  It's not that I'm a fair weather kinda gal, but I spend so much time in the rain, in the mud, in the river with the dogs, it's nice to be clean (ish) and feel the sun on my back.

As soon as we have a week or more of nice weather everyone just seems happier.  I meet more people whilst walking the hounds; mind you this can also be a bad thing as they aren't the most obedient of dogs!  I meet up with other mum friends and let the children run wild on the local playing fields, we explore and I can wear nicer outfits.  The latter makes for a happy mummy!

Although it is lovely to go on day trips, we visited Pepper Pig World last week.  Sometimes you have the most fun doing the simplest of things.  We explore the garden, creepy crawlies are her latest favourite.  I'm not a huge fan but I pretend to be as excited as her and not at all scared, even though I want to run a million miles away from anything with eight or more legs!!  We have visited lots of parks and I've come to realise, that my outfit choices are not always suitable when you have to climb up a slide or through a tunnel and you are wearing a rather flimsy, semi see through Zara shirt dress!! 

But the highlight of this week was watching Harriet sit on Ellie, my Section A pony, for the first time. 

A couple of weeks ago we visited my 18hh ex showjumper at his fantastic retirement home Grosmont Farm in Abergavenny.  This superb retirement facility is just what my much loved old boy needs.  A relaxed and calming environment but still enough going on with the lambing and the dairy herd to keep his interest.  Their care of the horses is second to none and I have regular updates via social media and email.  Whilst visiting Lurch, horse mad Harriet was lucky enough to have a ride on Appy, a fantastic bombproof, kind, honest pony owned by the Robinson family.  She enjoyed it so much I couldn't wait to arrange a visit to see my pony Ellie who is currently on loan to an older, horse mad little girl. 

From the minute she spotted Ellie and the other horses in the field she was shrieking 'horsey, horsey'.  As we led her around I saw the moment she was hooked.  You see ponies and horses have grace, they have beauty and they have spirit.  It's an addiction  I just can't explain.  From the first moment I sat on a pony I knew they would forever be in my heart.  Watching her have so much enjoyment made me miss riding so much.  I'm looking forward to reconnecting with my passion and encouraging hers as she grows.  Yes I probably will be that push pony club mum!

And finally I actually had a night #outout! One of my lovely, beautiful work colleagues from a previous job is finally getting hitched!  I am so over the moon for her but sadly I cannot make the wedding in India.  I am absolutely gutted so there was no way I was missing out on the hen party!  Delicious Mexican food and far too many cocktails but what a fun  night.  I wore a jumpsuit from Warehouse that is from their Spring/Summer range.  It's still quite cool in the evenings so I teamed it with my ever faithful leather jacket and a statement next necklace.  I love that fact you can add some bold colours to khaki green.  It's so easy to wear dressed up or down, I decided to team it on this occasion with coral strappy sandals. 

Home by midnight for us rock n roll stars.. not like the old days.  But back then I could wallow in self pity in bed until midday and then bribe someone to bring me a McDonalds.  These days I'm woken abruptly around 7 am on a good day and there's no rest all day.  But would I change a thing?  Definitely not!

Victoria

xx

MANAGING TIME

Sometimes I look at my watch and it is already 10:30am and I have literally done nothing.  Sometimes the simplest of tasks like convincing a child to eat their breakfast and then get dressed take me over an hour.  Sometimes it's 5pm and all I've managed to do all day is walk the dogs and feed my child. 

There is always a never ending amount of washing and ironing, there is always a never ending amount of dog hair on my beautiful cream tiles and there is always, always glass that needs cleaning thanks to two wet noses and a pair of constantly sticky hands!!

So how do some do it?  They work full time, their house is immaculate and they still have spare time for playing, arts and crafts and family time.  I barely have time to straighten my hair! 

I'll admit, Harriet isn't the earliest of risers (lucky me), so I take full advantage of this and stay in bed too!  I'm not a morning person, even when I worked full time I would hit the snooze button 74 times before I dragged my butt out of bed.  This I fear, may be my biggest down fall. 

I am always complaining that I can't get any housework done when I'm alone with Harriet.  She tries to ride the hoover and clean the dogs.  She empties the cupboards and drawers as fast as I'm putting things away.  I end up getting about one quarter of my list of jobs completed and it takes me all day.  On the very rare occasions that I am bright as a button early in the morning, it is true I get so much done.  But other days I take full advantage of my husband leaving at silly o'clock for work and I starfish in our bed until I hear 'Mummy, mummy, mummy'.   Does this make me selfish?  Lazy?  I think not.  We all have good days and bad days.  Sometimes Harriet sleeps all night, sometimes she doesn't.  Sometimes I nearly murder my husband when his snoring is still keeping me awake at 4am and sometimes I don't. 

But from the minute she wakes we don't stop.  Most mornings Harriet accompanies me on the morning dog walk along the canal.  It's so peaceful in the morning and so beautiful.  Now she's a little older she can help feed the ducks and we talk about the different animals we meet along the way.  It's then home to quickly change and eat a snack before we head out to her first activity of the day.  We meet friends, we play, we make things and we walk the dogs again in the afternoon.  We are always super busy but sometimes I am my own worse enemy when it comes to time management.

I have really enjoyed writing my blog over the last couple of months but I have been quiet for a couple of weeks.  I complained to my husband I hadn't had time, that every time I sit down to write, a toddler is screaming for my attention.  But truth is, I could be a little more organised.  I do think that because I am not working I am missing structure.  I insist Harriets days are quite structured (but not regimented) but I never follow my own advice.  I need to be more disciplined with myself and start organising my days better especially when she goes to sleep in the evening. 

So although I plan to be more organised and I have promised my husband I will cook more (yeah right!), if you do visit me and my home doesn't look 'insta-beautiful', that's because we are out having fun; we are learning and exploring.  Let's face it, the dogs are going to shed more hair tomorrow and Harriet will spill more food! 

Victoria
xx